What God Said

One upon a time in Heaven, God went missing for 6 days. Eventually, Michael the archangel found him resting on the 7th day and asked where he had been.

God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downward though the clouds, "Look I made a planet and I've put life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance. For example Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe will be poor." God pointed to different countries, "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice"

The Archangel, impressed by God's work, pointed to a large land mass in the middle of North America. "What's that one?"

"Ah," said God. "That's Nebraska, the most glorious place on Earth. The people from Nebraska will be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found traveling the world. They'll be extemely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known as diplomats and carriers of peace.

I'm also going to give them a super-human, undefeatable football team who will be admired and feared by all who come accross them."

Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then proclaimed: "What about balance? you said there would be balance"

God replied wisely, "Wait til you see the loud mouthed idiots I'm putting next to them in Colorado and Iowa!"

OMG.

I HATE YOU, and speaking of diplomats, you have a FREAK UNICAMERAL, my god this further proves that you AK-SAR-BENS are backwards! I HATE THE HUSKER EVEN MORE NOW!!!

does any one know why there are people living in Iowa?
because thats where the wagon broke down while they were moving west.

yeah in Cater Lake, I knew we should have gave that back to Nebraksa